I sit there on the terrace, a quiet evening where I watch the sunset and stars rise above making the evening even more mesmerising.
I think to myself what a wonderful evening?
I pick up my phone and text you, “Hey, I wish you were here! It’s a pleasant evening and it would be beautiful to fall asleep hugging you tight.” I smile like a fool looking at my text imagining the exact same thing. And I put my phone down hoping you’d see and text back saying “I wish that too. But nevertheless, imagine me there right beside you is cuddling.”
But little did I know you’d not see my texts and answer my phone for days. And not even check up on me.
Now, I sit here all by myself reflecting on my decisions and where did I go wrong? And what did I do to deserve this? I realised, I just wasn’t with the right person and I just didn’t the signs hanging out in the air
I’ve always been that person who never thought who could be sad or who could get over things very fast. People would call me “The happy child”. I was always tagged with this. Nobody knew what it would feel like to break on the inside and not being able to speak what you feel and what you think.
Somedays are too chaotic outside, somedays on the inside, somedays you don’t know what is chaotic, somedays you don’t know what is it that’s bothering you, is it an external factor or an internal factor or is there even a thing that exists that bothers you?
As I grew up, I always knew how to hide everything behind the smile and every emotion covered with that smile that created positivity for everyone around. I thought I was talented enough to do so, I was talented enough to keep all emotions safe inside and not let go of them.
I met this person, who changed a lot about me and in me.
An angel that made me feel, this is where I belong, this is the person I need to live with and this is where your emotions have to be shared.
That person turned out not just to be my Goddess or my angel, but…
Turned out to make me feel protected against all the odds like a FATHER does to his child.
Turned out to make me feel loved, cared and wanted only my happiness at all times, like a MOTHER.
Turned out to be the shoulder I needed to shed my emotions like a BEST FRIEND.
That person fixed so many unknown and incomplete spaces in the puzzle.
That person was also the reason the puzzle could never be complete, it was this person that I always needed to complete my self and that person fit in so perfectly that, the beauty of the puzzle revealed to be a better one than the image on the cover of the box.
That person turned out to fit so perfectly unlike all the other puzzle pieces that tried to fit into the empty spaces.
Maybe that’s the reason it felt so chaotic before because there were so many spaces that could never be complete and all the people kept competing to fit themselves into it, leaving major scars and bruises so deep that could never be erased.
Maybe that is why the path was always so hard and filled with obstacles and it took long years to reach this destination.
As they say, every good thing comes with a price and takes a lot of time and patience to reach.
And now every obstacle and hardship is revealed to be so fruitful.
And that person be it yesterday, today or tomorrow or years to come will always remain YOU!
You’re the reason behind all my happiness in these years.
They’ve been days even without knowing you’ve just made me feel so complete and so important and loved.
When I thought the lights are never going to be lite, you walked with so much glow like the sun and lightened every single cell in me.
When I thought it’s never going to be a beautiful sight, you walked in with your smile and made every single aspect to be so beautiful.
When I thought I’m always going to feel the spaces between my fingers to be empty, you put your hand and covered all of them even the tiniest space possible.
When I thought I’ll always have the seat next to me empty no matter what the path is going to be, you sat down on that seat, not just sat down on that seat but you sat down on the driver’s seat and now you take me to places I’ve never been and I thought I’d never can reach.
When I thought that dreams are going to always be scary and emotionally kill me, you walked in there too and made sure the fears and the emotions fade out completely.
When I thought I could never have someone all to myself, you walked in and said “YOU ARE MINE”, even before I could say it to you.
When I thought it’s never going to be happy, you walked in as the HAPPINESS all in you, even without your knowledge.
Even without saying anything, you just complete me in all possible ways and you’ll always be the reason for me to feel happy and content. You’ll always be there behind each of my smile and each of my thought and each of my spell and each of my prayer. Your love has changed me so much that today I want to be happy and I want to feel all the happiness by just sharing all my days with YOU. Today, even without speaking a word you know what I feel, you know what I’m thinking and you know how chaotic it is up in the head and you know how to fix it too.
You’re my happy place, you’re my support system, you’re my happy shore, you’re my goddess, you’re my angel and you’re my everything! This is you for me forever and beyond.